I hate….The French

A short crap update whilst I attempt to perfect my other bible-sized rantings on various worldly annoyances. The trouble with this blog post is that France fucking sucks so much, where do you start?

Some of you may recall the amusing Google search response posted years ago. If any of you have studied history, you’ll know full well how fucking pathetic France is when it comes to wars or other military action. If you want an extensive summary just read this page. Note how many times they’ve won…..

My own personal gripe with France is how rude and unaccomodating their people are. I speak English, fluently. I understand some basic French (as well as the essential obscenities). In the couple of occasions I’ve been to France and attempted to put my (albeit limited) French skills to the test, they have looked down their noses at me in disgust. What’s the deal here? Give me some fucking credit, at least. I come to your stinking frog-slaughtering country and try to communicate in your native tongue, and you don’t appreciate that? Shit, please. If it wasn’t for Britain and the USA, you motherfuckers would be speaking GERMAN right now. In fact, what am I doing trying to speak French? You fucks should by all rights be speaking English, whilst bowing down and kissing my fucking feet. Our ancestors died to liberate you so you could do what?

• Make shitty movies that nobody wants to watch, unless it’s for the nude scenes
• Make shitty music that all sounds the same, and nobody has ever heard of.
• Pretend you’re world class chefs/cooks by finding the most bizarrely disgusting animals or insects to eat.
• Build EuroDisney…… Wow.
• Create disgusting cheese that nobody likes
• Become alcoholics by giving champagne to the world. If I was as pathetic as you fucks I’d get drunk every day too.

If France were to disappear (read: get blown up) from the face of the planet, chances are you’d never notice. The only thing they’d be remember for is the Statue of Liberty… which, let’s face it, once you’ve seen once you can forget about. Kinda like the Eiffel tower.

Fuck France.

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